Home School Life

It’s funny what a couple of days in the kindergarten can do to a person. I’m finding myself yearning to live in a much more conscious way, with an awareness of how my every interaction with my children affects them and how the circumstances of my life affect those interactions. I will confess to not always being the most patient mother. Transitions in our home are often accompanied by screeches as we buzz around the house, hunt for shoes, and complain about chores.

So, I’ve given some thought as to what creates those speed bumps in our lives. What I’ve realized is that our struggles primarily center around disorganization.  Shoes are a great example and a really good metaphor for how we get around in life. So, here’s my disorganized life, as seen through The Girl’s favorite pair of Merrell sandals.

Situation #1 — On a good day, The Girl comes home and her shoes come off and go into the front closet. Other days they stay on and end up coming off later in a mysterious location. The entire family joins in a shoe finding game trying to get out the door, already late for the soccer game. The Mother yells. The Little Boy cries convinced he’s going to miss his game. The Girl feels guilty and faces future counseling bills to deal with the damage inflicted upon her by her unsupportive family. Life lesson? Build healthy habits.

Situation #2 — The mysterious location in situation #1 is discovered by The Dog, whose favorite pasttime is shoe-chewing. If we are lucky we discover her before she has done much damage, but in the case of the $40 Merrells the strap was chewed through. Life lesson? Consistency! Perhaps extra-vigilant supervision of The Dog would have curbed her shoe-chewing passion before now.

Situation #3 — When the mysterious location happens to be discovered by The Girl before The Dog she puts on those Merrells and goes out to jump on the trampoline. The shoes come off on the grass by the trampoline, the jumping commences and when it is time to come in the feel of evening dew-moist grass is so pleasant that the shoes aren’t worth remembering. The most popular mysterious location from Situation #1? The trampoline. Then The Dog goes out into the yard and we replay Situation # 2. Life lesson? Respect your things and care for them.

Situation #4 — The Mother resews the chewn (is that a word?) strap and they are almost as good as new. With renewed inspiration, The Girl decides to take her shoes upstairs to her room every time they come off. But said room looks like a tornado hit it, which creates even more difficult last-minute shoe-finding missions. Life lesson? Be tidy. Put your things away.

Situation #5 — The Dog sleeps in the cyclone wreckage of said room. Knowing that the wreckage is likely to be devoured, The Mother tethers The Dog to the bed as she sleeps and creates a wreckage-free circumference around the tether point. The wreckage, in the form of one $40 Merrell encroaches upon the wreckage-free zone, The Dog reaches one constantly growing paw towards said Merrell and while The Mother and The Girl sleep chews away with joyful (but quiet) abandon. The Mother and The Girl discover the carnage in them morning and mourn the death of the completely unsalvageable $40 Merrell. The Girl wears soccer cleats to the shoe store and The Mother resents the purchase of $15 Payless slip-ons. The Ex-Husband who purchased the Merrells discovers their fate (despite The Mother’s and The Girl’s efforts to keep him in the dark) and silently resents the impact that The Mother’s disorganized and chaotic life has on his checkbook.

Yikes, I think I’ll go upstairs and tidy.